A Dog's Dictionary & Guide

petskers · Site Admin Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 1254

Hi everyone,

Came across this and thought I would share.....

Leash: A strap that attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead your owner where you want him or her to go. Make sure that you are waiting patiently with leash in mouth when your owner comes home from work. This immediately makes your owner feel guilty and the walk is lengthened by a good 10 minutes.

Dog Bed: Any soft, clean surface, such as a white bedspread, newly upholstered couch or the dry cleaning that was just picked up.

Drool: What you do when your owners have food and you don't.To do this properly, sit as close as you can, look sad and let the drool fall to the floor or better yet on their laps.

Sniff: A social custom to use when you greet other dogs or those people that sometimes smell like dogs.

Garbage Can: A container your neighbors put out weekly to test your ingenuity. Stand on your hind legs and push the lid off with your nose. If you do it right, you are rewarded with food wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume, moldy crusts of bread and sometimes even an old Nike.

Bicycles: Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards. The rider swerves and falls into the bushes, and you prance away.

Thunder: A signal the world is coming to an end. Humans remain amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warn them of the danger by trembling, panting, rolling your eyes wildly and following at their heels.

Wastebasket: A dog toy filled with paper, envelopes and old candy wrappers. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the house. This is particularly fun to do when there are guests for dinner and you prance around with the contents of that very special bathroom wastepaper basket!

Sofas: Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean. If there are people sitting on the couch just include them as a handy wipe.

Bath: A process owners use to clean you, drench the floor, walls and themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.

Lean: Every good dog's response to the command "sit," especially if your owner is dressed for an evening out. Incredibly effective before black-tie events.

Love: A feeling of intense affection, given freely and without restriction, shared by you and your owner. Show it by wagging your tail.

Wink

rovinghound · Joined: 21 May 2007 Posts: 31

:)These are thoughts that are all good ones that make you think about what is being said. I like to read so this has been a good read for me. Out where there is lots of time and quiet I appreicate the this site to visit and to read everyones thoughts here. It is possible to feel good when you get a nagging for being near people who think like you do. Want to get to the other posts so see you guys, keep up the articles petskers. Good reading.

moneylady · Joined: 06 Mar 2007 Posts: 282

Wastebasket: A dog toy filled with paper, envelopes and old candy wrappers. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the house. This is particularly fun to do when there are guests for dinner and you prance around with the contents of that very special bathroom wastepaper basket!

This is from the directory of things for what dogs do or think and this
is one that Missy J wants Rolling Eyes

laura · Joined: 09 Mar 2007 Posts: 66

Moneylady, Missy J sounds like she would love this site of reading
So does my Ketsup and here is hers that she thinks belongs to her way of doing things. Wink

"Sofas: Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean. If there are people sitting on the couch just include them as a handy wipe."

Laughing

laura · Joined: 09 Mar 2007 Posts: 66

Moneylady, Missy J sounds like she would love this site of reading
So does my Ketsup and here is hers that she thinks belongs to her way of doing things. Wink

"Sofas: Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean. If there are people sitting on the couch just include them as a handy wipe."

Laughing

texbean · Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 175

Out of this article, I believe that Reddog would like the part below and
it is really a true thing.

Drool: What you do when your owners have food and you don't.To do this properly, sit as close as you can, look sad and let the drool fall to the floor or better yet on their laps.

If this isn't just the right TRUTH, says this....... Laughing

lonesomedove · Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 40

texbean · Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 175

Thanks for the post, I hope your family is doing okay after that bad weather that you
guys went through. Were any of your family in the flooding or tornadoes?
Some of our friends were flood waters. They had a real rough time. They are still
trying to get things back to normal. And my reddog does look sad with that big, big drool.
Ha.................................